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Jumping and Family

by Elton Hodges

After a lengthy lay-off from the sport of skydiving (4 years to be exact), I finally decided to get back into the saddle.

The reasons for my getting out were, in my opinion, validated by two very important people; my wife and a wonderful new daughter.

At the time I was thinking that I could use the money that skydiving required for mortgage payments on a new house and all the little day to day costs that having a family invariably requires. I was working in aviation as an AME (Aircraft Maintenance Engineer), and the hours were extremely long. Skydiving became an activity that I no longer had time for.

It’s never an easy decision to give up something that has invariably become part of what you are. I was a “jumper” through and through. I thought of jumping daily and was always racing out to the DZ on weekends to get myself centered and feeling good with the world.

But now having a partner who knew me almost as well as I knew myself, and sharing our time with our little girl, who gave me the same feeling of being “centered” as well as skydiving did, if not more so, it made it easier that I had ever imagined to give up the activity that defined me.

Of course it never was very far from my thoughts. I would always look up into the sky on days when it was perfect out, thinking of how it felt to fly with no restrictions, sharing a jump with some good friends. Later ending the night with a recap of all you’d accomplished in the days jumping while sitting around the campfire. I was certainly no “sky god”, I didn’t have enough jumps or experience to even consider myself a “demi-sky god” or even a “sky-saint”. I think I ranked about “apostle” level, but hey, you have to start somewhere. I was just a normal Joe who jumped for a number of years, but found himself at a crossroads in life where I felt it was time to make a choice. I wasn’t into jumping so deep that my existence and mental welfare depended on making the next load, nor was my daily income and sustenance dependent on whether or not there was someone who needed the services of a DZ employee. I was a weekend warrior.

So off and on over 4 years I found myself thinking about jumping, but never really missing it. More of a fondness for what had been, almost like the feeling you get when you’ve had a great vacation and you invariably recall everything that you did and what it felt like at exactly that moment. You recall and enjoy, but don’t feel the need to book the ticket to get your fix. For me, that was what jumping (or the absence of it) felt like. Perhaps the hardest part of leaving was the loss of skydiving friends. In some ways you still have connections, but time passes and after moving across the country, my connections faded and I became just another “whuffo”.

8 months ago something happened. I don’t know what it was, but suddenly I got the itch again. I had felt it in 1997, that was after I had taken a year off and had gone back to school for a short period of time and didn’t have the money to jump. My gear was sold for course tuition and I suffered for a year from the pangs of jump withdrawal. It was much more painful, as I didn’t want to give up jumping, but had no choice due to financial realities. So here it was, back again. I didn’t have an overwhelming urge this time, but more just a little niggle in the back of the head. I swayed back and forth for 3 months trying to talk myself out of it, telling myself it would be “BAD IDEA #1”.

I was a father first and foremost and involved heavily in a project that was extremely important at work. It’s now 4 years later and I’ve changed careers from aviation to the defense industry, and I’m travelling to numerous overseas locations. It made more sense to justify why getting into skydiving would be more hassle than help. I told myself that no matter how much I would enjoy it, if something happened to me, I’m leaving my family with nothing but financial obligations that they would not be able to meet as I’m the single breadwinner. I also thought of how I would feel not being around to see my daughter grow up and what I would miss out on. I also thought of how much it hurt to think of her eventually forgetting who I was and what she meant to me. It was agonizing when I told myself that I was so self absorbed, that I would actually think of skydiving, when the risks were so large and I could lose all the things that at this period in my life define who I am.

For those who have had this debate with themselves, never will I look at them as something other than mentally adept and strong. It is a debate that you can never win. You will always know that you have something in your life that transcends all other worldly concerns. Your family is paramount, but more importantly, your family is your pillar.

I was very lucky in having my wife, (remember I mentioned she knows me better than I do), realize what it meant to me to have the opportunity to get back into the sport that had left me behind.

Together we mapped out a return to the sport that we believed would be in both our best interests. For anyone who is thinking of getting back into skydiving with the responsibilities of family now weighing in, here are some possible questions that will need to be answered:

Together we mapped out a return to the sport that we believed would be in both our best interests. For anyone who is thinking of getting back into skydiving with the responsibilities of family now weighing in, here are some possible questions that will need to be answered:

1. INSURANCE: Do you have insurance that is valid through work or privately? Will it cover you in case of death or injury during extreme sports / activities? Eg. Skydiving, paragliding, scuba and pilot of an aircraft. If not, can a ryder be added to the policy and is the cost worthwhile. (There is third party insurance that will cover skydiving and its associated risks for a reasonable fee). DO NOT leave your family or yourself without any income in case of your injury or death. In case of severe injury, you better hope you die if you have no insurance because I’ll feel for your family if they have to pay to keep you in a comatose/vegetative state. That sounds harsh, but it is reality.
2. EQUIPMENT: Equipment is extremely advanced today and as time moves on, it will become even more so. There is no reason nowadays to have to suffer through having to choose between a smooth opening canopy that must also be slow and huge to forgive for landing errors and a squirrelly opening high performance wing that will plow you into the ground with the slightest error. Skydivers can now choose from a huge flock of wings that can be smooth opening, a fighter while on the toggles and risers and still give you a nice approach while landing “straight in”. If you can’t land your wing straight in with no wind, then don’t jump it. That’s one of the first risk mitigating things you can do when getting back in. GET AN AAD. I never used to own one, now I do, and I still practice my cutaways religiously. It’s my last resort if I’m unconscious or injured, but it’s there if needed. It was the one thing my wife and I agreed on. If I didn’t have an AAD, then I wouldn’t be jumping. GET ALL USED GEAR INSPECTED, including your own if you haven’t sold it. We know how the gear works, but if you haven’t touched it in a while, make sure your local rigger takes a look at all of it; don’t use/buy it until he has. Also make sure you have him give you a packing refresher while he does your reserve repacks, while putting in your new or existing AAD. I won’t go in depth on equipment here, suffice to say, talk to your local rigger and let them know what you want to do and amount of risk vs. performance you’re willing to accept.
3. DROPZONE: Go to all the local DZs in your area and see who’s jumping there. Are there families around that are watching mom and dad in action, or is it 20ish-early 30ish 500-600 jump next group of “sky-god” wannabes that are too cool? At this point of re-entering the sport, the last thing you want is to be in the sky with a bunch of testosterone addled young men who want to complete the biggest VRW formation they can build out of an Otter or two. Your better bet is to find the local mom and pop DZ with one or two small aircraft and a group of family jumpers who just want to enjoy themselves and maybe do a couple of relaxed 4 ways, or some solo or 2 participant head down jumps. Once you’ve gotten back into the swing and are confident in your abilities, then you might consider getting into something bigger. I used to love 8-9 VRW zoo jumps. I would never even consider it now. When at Z-Hills in January, I did one head down jump, and I made sure I was the last one out of the Otter.
4. FITNESS: It seems to happen to the best of us. We have a family and invariably we gain that little bit of weight to go along with it. LOSE IT. It’s much easier to relax and assume the positions you need when you’re not trying to see your feet in a sit while looking around the pot that seems to be in your way.
5. REFRESHER: YES, YOU NEED IT. This one goes along with having your rigger go over your main packing skills. You’ll have forgotten a few things, and some things will have moved on during your absence. Don’t think you can just get back in the air with what you remember. You’ll want to go over the equipment characteristics, cut-away re-training and if available do a couple of refresher jumps on large, docile student gear in low wind conditions. Gradually move down in size to the little rocket that you once flew. But if you’re keeping family in mind, the rocket should be at least 2-3 sizes larger than what you used to jump. I ended my jumping in 2006 with a 150. I was 240 lbs. at the time. I’m now at 235 lbs. and I’m jumping a 189. This is my agreement with my family. I’ll go no lower, since I don’t really feel the need to do huge swoops and I can land this in any condition while performing flat turns 50-60 feet off the deck if needed.
6. ATTITUDE: When you were jumping full time and going hard at it it’s probably safe to say that there was always talk of jump numbers and time in the sport. You’ll always find at every dropzone the group of individuals that parade around with their jump numbers on their sleeve and how long they’ve been in the sport. They’ll have you feeling that since you’ve left, things have changed so much and you are no longer relevant. Then you’ll find the group that jump numbers are just a number, and if you’ve been a jumper then you’re coming back to family. These are the people to hang out with. Enjoy your return. Some dropzones are the same way; you’ll find some will not want you to bring children, even if they will be watched. Others will accept them, but not be too thrilled about it. Finally, some will actually WANT you to bring your family. Their attitude is all for one and one for all when it comes to jumping. This is what you should look for. If you can include your family on your jump outings, then it becomes much easier for them to accept it as a family affair, rather than a separate entity. Separate entities are hard on families. You need your alone time for sure, but try to make it more for the book store or shop for a few hours a week. A full day to you and you alone is being selfish. Besides, if the dropzone is a fun place, you may find that your family looks forward to the social aspect as much as you do the jumping side of it.
7. FAMILY: This is the big one. If you don’t have the support of your family or if it is given with any doubt then you cannot just carry on with returning to jumping. Your family needs to not only accept, but encourage you to pursue this facet of your life. My wife has accepted powered paragliding, skydiving and piloting as my loves. She has always encouraged me to do at least one of them, knowing that it will keep me happy and that the return is greater than the risks (which she has a say in, helping plan risk mitigation )
8. ACCEPTANCE: If any of the above has negative implications on your return to jumping. DON’T JUMP. Jumping isn’t going to die out tomorrow; you can always take some more time to bring yourself back into the sport. I waited 4 years to get back in; I would have waited longer if my family wasn’t as ready for me to get back into it as I was.

You can get back into jumping after a long layoff, especially if it’s a change in lifestyle related to family. The most important thing to remember is that in this phase of your jumping life, you need to have your family involved as much as possible with all the relevant issues. Risk mitigation is a huge factor in this regard. There are a number of things that you can do to mitigate risk, from using a set of docile gear, to equipping yourself with audibles and AADs. This can also include limiting yourself to smaller jump formations and not taking any additional risks by ensuring you don’t jump beyond what you’re comfortable with. Even if you were once comfortable in certain situations, if you have any doubts in your mind now, don’t do it.

If you find that you cannot meet any one of the 8 points above, then it will be better to sit out this year and wait for a more opportune time.

If you can meet the 8 points above, then what are you waiting for, get back in the air and enjoy yourself, just keep it safe and make sure you get home at night to what’s really important. Or better yet, have them meet you on the ground and share your day at the DZ with each other.

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